Thursday, February 14, 2013

He Was Thirsty...So What?

My human, the Ponytail Patriot, has been very busy lately and I'm so proud of her. But now it's my turn and I want to address the issue of Marco Rubio taking a drink of water during the GOP response to the Petulant President's SOTU.

Who cares? The man had just recorded a spanish version of his speech and his mouth was dry. So what if he needed to wet his whistle? Seriously...this is what folks want to talk about?

It didn't bother me that he took a drink of water. What bothered me is the person who placed the water bottle on a table so far away that the reach was awkward. Yes, I said it, they should have placed it a little closer to the man.

Eventually I will be announcing my candidacy for Senate in 2014 and I want to make it clear when it's my turn to give the GOP response to the SOTU what I expect. I expect the humans setting it up to place either a very large water bowl or a toilet as close as possible to me and the microphone. Hey...I'm a canine, a toilet works for me to get a drink of water on occasion. Are you going to criticize that?

Get over it humans. Canine common sense dictates that anyone giving a speech at anytime will get thirsty. The left is just upset that Rubio gave a better speech in a shorter amount of time. It didn't take him an hour to tell us the Petulant President has no clue as to what he's doing.

Now, can we get back to the important issues? You, the economy, gas prices...etc.

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Pine Needles and the Forest

It seems that a number of humans are upset that Nancy Pelosi released a “photoshopped” picture of the 113th female members of Congress yesterday.  Well, may I just say to those people…WHO CARES?  Consider everything else those silly humans in D.C. did this week and then ask yourself, Is it really that big an issue?

Once again, I am sitting here with my human before the sun is up writing about the lack of canine common sense I see in humans.  I’m asking myself, why humans are focusing on something so inconsequential in the big scheme of what else is going on up there.  Stop people.  You’re missing the forest by focusing on a pine needle.

Let me explain.  On January 1st of this year, the 112th Congress passed the “American Taxpayer Relief Act” (a.k.a. the Fiscal Cliff Crap Cupcake) that did nothing to address tax reform, the deficit or the national debt.  Instead the act added even more and every human in America with a job will see their take home pay decrease.  The kabuki theatre over the fiscal cliff deal and the hurricane Sandy relief is far more important than adding four women to a picture because they couldn’t get their bums in gear to be there on time for a photo to be taken.

The 113th Congress was sworn in on Wednesday and John Boehner (forever after to be know by those in my home as the “Sniveling Speaker”) was re-elected to his position as Speaker of the House.  This is NOT a good thing for the American people and of far more concern to me than a picture.  And let’s not forget that Senator Feinstein of California is pushing her new “gun control” legislation in this Congress.  Hmmm…again, taking away the rights of law abiding gun owners OR an altered picture?  I’m going with gun rights.

Wake up people!  Smell the coffee my human is constantly drinking and realize that sweating the little things does nothing but to distract everyone.  Stop taking your eyes off the ball and focus!  For the next two years we are stuck with a Sniveling Speaker, a Petulant President and a Hapless Harry running the country.  More than ever we need to be paying attention to what they’re trying to sneak by the American people and hold our elected officials accountable if they support any nonsense like SaxbyChambliss did when he voted yes for that ridiculous Fiscal Cliff Crap Cupcake.

With the New Year come new priorities and goals.  Patton’s priority this year is learning all he can about the Constitution and Civics.  My human is focused on holding elected officials in all levels of government accountable.  And MY priority is holding you guys accountable.  That’s right, I’m going to be watching your reactions and I’m going to be talking about you this year.  We can’t afford the distractions and apparently that needs to be pointed out.  I’m hoping that by reminding y’all to stop looking at pine needles, your canine common sense will kick in and you’ll remember to hold those in office accountable and educate your friends and family.

I wish each of you success in the New Year and much happiness.  Just remember…I really don’t like the taste of bum, so do me a favor and stop sweating the small stuff so I won’t have to give you a nip to remind you of the bigger picture.